Adverjudgments.

So the love of my life and I were discussing Gmail's tendency to pluck terms from your email and regurgitate ads specific to those topics. Such as: Phillips Seafood By Mail. Cheerleading Software. Wholesale Japanese Koi. Some people, he was saying, find such things intrusive, an invasion of privacy. "It just grabs words. And besides," he said, "I appreciate the opportunity to learn that whatever it is I am writing about in my mail, I can get it wholesale. This cracker's defective."

"Use less pressure on the cheese. Besides," I replied, turning back to the matter at hand, "it isn't as though Gmail is actualling reading your mail. It isn't like it's judging you."

"What if it did?"

• Are You Sure You Need That Extra Piece Of Pie?
  
• You Really Need To Smoke Less And Bathe More.
  
• Man, You Sure Are Dating Out Of Your League, Aren't You. Try Women Your Own Age For A Change!
  
• Nice To See You're Doing Something With Your Degree.
  
• They Make Videos Of That In Germany -- Click Here So I Can Say I Told You So.

Charles thinks these could be called judgmertisements. I prefer adverjudgments. And this is my blog, so there.

Update: 4/22/08:
My Gmail account has starting feeding me adds in Finnish, based on the vocab lists I've been typing and mailing to myself from library computers. As attachments, mind. Gmail is spying on my Word attachments.